My Mom, Stacy, Ryan, Brad, Grant, and I loaded in my mom's truck and hit garage sales today. My goal: fill the entire bed of the truck.
I'm not very good at the whole garage sale thing. I am very good at locking up my breaks and throwing the car into park (after making a huge U turn in the middle of the road) when I see something good for sale.
Towards the end of the day we stopped at a sale. I screamed "sandbox" before the truck was even in park. I knew that I was buying that sandbox....no matter what.
The sandbox:
- Mold - CHECK
- Mildew - CHECK
- Lid - CHECK
- Dad who reduced the price just to get ride of it - CHECK
After we got home I set out on a mission....scrub, sanitize, and deodorize my now $5.00 sandbox. Brad asked me why I was cleaning it so much, I responded "I don't want Grant to get a disease!"
Armed with a sponge and CLR I attacked the sandbox. It didn't even see me coming. Down on my hands and knees I scrubbed, sanitized, and deodorized. The process was not pretty. I scrubbed as hard as I could. I soaked my pants and squirted myself in the face 6 times. Half way through I wondered what I had gotten myself into. I took a break and checked on Grant who was sleeping.
(I slipped on the kitchen floor and tracked in dirty foot prints. I walked into his room and didn't realize that the other half of his monitor was in my pocket.......good-bye hearing......)
I figured that I better finish my task. A sandbox was not getting the best of me. My hands were raw and my arms burned. I kept telling myself "$5....$5....$5!" By the end...the sandbox was begging for mercy. But it was not over. I flipped the box upside down. To my surprise there were cobwebs, leafs, creepy crawlies.....I mean spiders had subdivisions......big ones! I was so annoyed. I thought that the sandbox was almost finished. The main part was cleaned, but the underneath was a mess!!
Using the same method, I attacked the underneath of the sandbox. My hands were really raw and I was really annoyed by the time I was done.
I propped the sandbox and lid against the side of the house. I looked the sandbox over with a fine tooth comb. It was finally finished! Clean. Yummy. Shinny. Ready to do its job!!
It needed to be dried. I ran back inside and grabbed a white towel. To my surprise a spider had called the sandbox home - tried to rebuild his sub - in the short time that I got the towel!
The sandbox, that now sits in the yard full of sand, resembles our lives. Often we judge others on the mold and mildew that we see without really knowing what the inside is like. We judge others without walking in their shoes.
On the other hand we may assume that the inside is in good shape because the outside appears to be clean. Or just when we think that everything is clean - a spider creeps in - no longer making us perfect.
In the end we are all sandboxes. On our hands and knees trying to do the best we can. It may be a frustrating - never ending task.
However, God cleans us, makes us fresh and shiny - with His white towel.
All Things Are Possible
Stephanie Miller
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Uncomfortable
"Feeling discomfort; uneasy; as, to be uncomfortable on account with one's position." Uncomfortable as defined by Webster-dictionary.net.
Several people have asked if I had seen or heard something specific that triggered my heart overhaul. To be honest, I have never thought about it..... So, here goes. Below is how I believe that God changed me.
Step 1
He put me on this earth. More importantly, He put me in America. Land of the Free, Home of the Brave. Am I making fun of America? No. I feel very blessed to be placed in a country where we are able to worship freely. A country where there is plenty of food to eat, water to drink. A country that has doctors and experts. Will I make fun of some Americans in this post? Most likely.
Step 2
He opened my eyes. He put my focus on the people of this world. He put my focus on the single mother who is working to raise her children, the college student who can't find a job, the dad whose only car just broke down, the child who forgot to ask for money for the Book Fair, the grandma who can't remember her granddaughter's name, the uncle who can't afford to pay for his prescriptions, the cousin who waits for test results. You get my point. God opened my eyes to the everyday people of this world. I have not even started talking about the people who are starving...dying...crying for help. THAT will be in another post....
Step 3
He called me to be uncomfortable. He has asked me to live daily - uncomfortably in this world. Is God asking me to dislike who I am, where I live, what I do? No. He is simply asking me to be uncomfortable with the things of this world - mainly with the way that some people spend their money.
Don't get me wrong. I love having water flow from the outside of my refrigerator, I enjoy listening to music on my IPod, I like starting my car from a mile away in the dead of winter. I'm not asking anyone to....not spend a dime, cut off all electric to their homes and pedal their cars Fred Flintstone style.
"I know that I know that I know"
I like this quote from my pastor because I feel like right now I know that I know that I know that God has asked me to reevaluate where my dollars go. I don't need a stove top that boils water in 90 seconds, I don't need a car that parallel parks on its own, and I do not need 963.5 channels on my TV.
Am I judging those who have those things? No. I am simply saying that God has called me away from those things. Would I still enjoy those things? Yes.
God has called me to live a life that is uncomfortable. I have just touched on the money aspect, however, there are many ways to live uncomfortably in this world. I am uncomfortable with some of the music and movies that are available, I am uncomfortable with the way that people are treated and spoken to, I am uncomfortable with the way that some spend their time and talents.
As Christians God has called us to live a life that is, at times, a little uncomfortable.
Will it ever be awkward? Maybe. Will it be easy? Maybe not. Why are Christian's called to be uncomfortable? Doesn't seem fair......
Comfortable
"In a condition of comfort; having comforts; not suffering or anxious; hence, contended; cheerful; as, to lead to a comfortable life"
Comfortable as defined by Webster-dictionary.net
God has made a promise - eternal life for those who believe and have a relationship with Him. Our current uncomfortable life will turn into sweet, wonderful, comfortable, Heaven.
All Things Are Possible
Stephanie Miller
Several people have asked if I had seen or heard something specific that triggered my heart overhaul. To be honest, I have never thought about it..... So, here goes. Below is how I believe that God changed me.
Step 1
He put me on this earth. More importantly, He put me in America. Land of the Free, Home of the Brave. Am I making fun of America? No. I feel very blessed to be placed in a country where we are able to worship freely. A country where there is plenty of food to eat, water to drink. A country that has doctors and experts. Will I make fun of some Americans in this post? Most likely.
Step 2
He opened my eyes. He put my focus on the people of this world. He put my focus on the single mother who is working to raise her children, the college student who can't find a job, the dad whose only car just broke down, the child who forgot to ask for money for the Book Fair, the grandma who can't remember her granddaughter's name, the uncle who can't afford to pay for his prescriptions, the cousin who waits for test results. You get my point. God opened my eyes to the everyday people of this world. I have not even started talking about the people who are starving...dying...crying for help. THAT will be in another post....
Step 3
He called me to be uncomfortable. He has asked me to live daily - uncomfortably in this world. Is God asking me to dislike who I am, where I live, what I do? No. He is simply asking me to be uncomfortable with the things of this world - mainly with the way that some people spend their money.
Don't get me wrong. I love having water flow from the outside of my refrigerator, I enjoy listening to music on my IPod, I like starting my car from a mile away in the dead of winter. I'm not asking anyone to....not spend a dime, cut off all electric to their homes and pedal their cars Fred Flintstone style.
"I know that I know that I know"
I like this quote from my pastor because I feel like right now I know that I know that I know that God has asked me to reevaluate where my dollars go. I don't need a stove top that boils water in 90 seconds, I don't need a car that parallel parks on its own, and I do not need 963.5 channels on my TV.
Am I judging those who have those things? No. I am simply saying that God has called me away from those things. Would I still enjoy those things? Yes.
God has called me to live a life that is uncomfortable. I have just touched on the money aspect, however, there are many ways to live uncomfortably in this world. I am uncomfortable with some of the music and movies that are available, I am uncomfortable with the way that people are treated and spoken to, I am uncomfortable with the way that some spend their time and talents.
As Christians God has called us to live a life that is, at times, a little uncomfortable.
Will it ever be awkward? Maybe. Will it be easy? Maybe not. Why are Christian's called to be uncomfortable? Doesn't seem fair......
Comfortable
"In a condition of comfort; having comforts; not suffering or anxious; hence, contended; cheerful; as, to lead to a comfortable life"
Comfortable as defined by Webster-dictionary.net
God has made a promise - eternal life for those who believe and have a relationship with Him. Our current uncomfortable life will turn into sweet, wonderful, comfortable, Heaven.
All Things Are Possible
Stephanie Miller
Friday, May 7, 2010
Holding Hands
Anyone who knows me knows that I am a sucker when it comes to rocking and cuddling with Grant. I still rock him to sleep and LOVE to cuddle with him. Before laying him down the other night I needed to squeak in some cuddle time.
I put him in my bed and curled up next to him. He was wearing fuzzy pajamas and the smell of Berry - Grins & Giggles lotion filled the air. His mouth was wide open, he was flopped on his back, and I could hear a faint snore. I'm not sure what happens when we turn into adults......we are just not that cute when we sleep :)
I held his soft, warm hand.
As I snuggled next to him I thought about how lucky we were to have such a healthy baby. I'm not talking about the cold, flu, snot healthy...I'm talking about the sleeps in his crib every night....walks, talks, and eats...healthy.
I was introduced to the blog world several years ago by a link on a Facebook page. I read their heartbreaking story about a premature, sick baby. From there I started following a couple different blogs - journals of people's lives.
Through the years I have read about God's healing power - children given a second chance at life. As those parents celebrated, I read about another family who received a different set of test results. Through those blogs came stories of hope and strength.
As I laid with Grant I thanked God for his health. I never want to take advantage of the fact that he can play outside, open Christmas presents, and eat animal crackers. It saddens me that there are children who don't know any different than hospital walls and needles....
I held Grant's hand and then realized that God was holding my hand...He holds your hand. It does not matter what you are going through or what you struggle with - God is here for you - He holds our hand - walks with us - guides us. How amazing is that?
See, Grant had no idea that I was holding his hand. I believe that that happens sometimes with God. There are times when we KNOW that He is holding our hand and then there are times that He WAS holding our hand and we didn't realize it.
It is one thing to look back and see how God was protecting us or providing for us when we didn't even know it was happening. It is another thing to IGNORE God and resist His hand. Right now God is holding my hand and He is holding yours.....
I don't want to be caught with my mouth open....snoring when He reaches out His hand.
All Things Are Possible.
-Stephanie Miller
I put him in my bed and curled up next to him. He was wearing fuzzy pajamas and the smell of Berry - Grins & Giggles lotion filled the air. His mouth was wide open, he was flopped on his back, and I could hear a faint snore. I'm not sure what happens when we turn into adults......we are just not that cute when we sleep :)
I held his soft, warm hand.
As I snuggled next to him I thought about how lucky we were to have such a healthy baby. I'm not talking about the cold, flu, snot healthy...I'm talking about the sleeps in his crib every night....walks, talks, and eats...healthy.
I was introduced to the blog world several years ago by a link on a Facebook page. I read their heartbreaking story about a premature, sick baby. From there I started following a couple different blogs - journals of people's lives.
Through the years I have read about God's healing power - children given a second chance at life. As those parents celebrated, I read about another family who received a different set of test results. Through those blogs came stories of hope and strength.
As I laid with Grant I thanked God for his health. I never want to take advantage of the fact that he can play outside, open Christmas presents, and eat animal crackers. It saddens me that there are children who don't know any different than hospital walls and needles....
I held Grant's hand and then realized that God was holding my hand...He holds your hand. It does not matter what you are going through or what you struggle with - God is here for you - He holds our hand - walks with us - guides us. How amazing is that?
See, Grant had no idea that I was holding his hand. I believe that that happens sometimes with God. There are times when we KNOW that He is holding our hand and then there are times that He WAS holding our hand and we didn't realize it.
It is one thing to look back and see how God was protecting us or providing for us when we didn't even know it was happening. It is another thing to IGNORE God and resist His hand. Right now God is holding my hand and He is holding yours.....
I don't want to be caught with my mouth open....snoring when He reaches out His hand.
All Things Are Possible.
-Stephanie Miller
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Our Story Begins
Hello and welcome to my blog! This blog was created for friends and family to join us on our journey as God has taken us out of our comfort zone and into the unknown. I am no author - just your average person trying to live in God's will. I hope that you enjoy our story - as we watch it unfold. We don't know what the future has in store for us, but we know that He is in control and so we chose to follow Him.
Here is a little background information for those of you who don't know us well.......
Brad and I met, dated, and were married while I finished my senior year in college. The path that led us to Bethel was very different. Brad knew that he wanted to go to college. He worked hard in high school, graduated with good grades and received scholarships for Bethel. Me on the other hand, different story. I decided my senior year that I wanted to go to Bethel. Why Bethel? Because my friends were going there. At the time I was barely going to graduate high school, but I knew that I wanted to go to Bethel College. As time progressed, I knew that God was sending me to Bethel. I did not have the grades to be accepted, but after a couple of classes at a community college, I was accepted to Bethel.
It did not take long for me to realize how important high school really was. I had spent so much time playing around, walking the halls, and hanging out in random gym classes, that I had no idea how to study. I remember typing papers early in my freshmen year of college, sending them to print, and turning them in without even reading them. I received a syllabus for each class, but did not read the material because the teacher never said we had to in class. When I entered Bethel I had no idea what was in store for me.......let alone studying for 4 years?!?!
The rest of my college career was spent reading, studying, praying, proofing, spell checking, reading, praying, writing, researching, praying, studying, and sleeping little. In the spring of 2005 I graduated with a Bachelors and Associates degree. Oh....and did I mention that I spent a semester on the Dean's List? :)
Brad and I were married in 2004 and after I graduated we moved to Flint....yeah, back to Flint.
After a long job hunt, we ended up in careers that we studied for and love. Brad works in the IT department at an insurance company and I am an assistant director and teacher at a preschool. We both worked very hard and thanked God for blessing us with such wonderful careers.
The more I enjoyed my job, the more I worked. I had a christian boss and and a great work family. My goal in life was to work, earn as much money as possible, and buy as many things possible. I wanted a big fat house, brand new cars, lots of vacations, and the opportunity to eat out whenever I pleased. I did not think much about those in need because after all they were choosing not to work as hard as I was. If they wanted nice things, they should work hard.
Calm Down....I'm not finished......
We decided in the winter of 2008 that it was time for kids. I was still going to work...because I needed all of those things, remember? In January of 2009 we had Grant. I will talk about him more in another post......
Since having Grant God has changed my heart. I don't think that it was just having Grant that changed me, God did a complete overhaul on my heart. He has taught me that there is more to life than stuff, money, and pride. I knew that I could not take my treasures to Heaven with me, but why not enjoy life as long as I was on this earth?
WRONG........
What exactly is happening on this earth? People who are hurting, suffering, dying because their needs are not being met. There are children going to school without having dinner the night before.....children uneducated.....children left alone.....children suffering. There are parents trying to make ends meet....doing what they can to survive. Are they not working hard enough? I believe that many are working harder that I ever have. God has given me a heavy, heavy heart for those in need.
In the summer of 2009, I felt God telling me that my time at the preschool was coming to an end. Of course, I did not accept His suggestion. By the fall, I realized that it was not a suggestion and my time at the school was coming to an end....whether I was ready or not. After a lot of prayer, I knew that God was telling me to give my notice at work. Hello? Who gives a notice in November that they are done in June? Me....... I argued with Him at first, but He was not changing His mind.
In June I will end my journey at the preschool and begin another journey. A journey that is a little scary. I enjoy my job and cannot picture me not working.....it seems crazy. What will I do in my spare time? See, while God was overhauling my heart, He was asking me to commit my spare time to those in need. I wondered....can't I serve those in need while I work. His answer...no.
There is always a BUT.......
What is the problem then? Serving God sounds good right? Yes, BUT....remember those scholarships for Bethel that Brad received that I did not? Yeah, my non-scholarships ended up to be big fat student loans. We cannot afford for me to quit working.
He always has a plan.
While at Bethel, Brad and I discussed my student loan debt, along with his debt. His was pocket change compared to mine. We were never worried and were well aware that we had a lot to repay. We both wanted to work...especially myself. Remember, I needed all that stuff.
Another reason why I was not worried was because God told me while in school that He would pay off my student loans. I did not think about it often and told Brad that my loans were taken care of. We actually joked about it....because it seemed crazy.
God is not crazy.
He had all of this planned. Sending me to Bethel, meeting Brad, graduating, allowing me to be consumed by the world, and ending with a complete heart overhaul. Oh...and did I mention the Dean's List? :)
What else did He have planned? The student loans. When I came home my senior year from high school and made my college announcement my mom asked me how I was going to pay for it and I said "my friends just called Fannie May and they got money." To that she replied "Stephanie, that is chocolate, you need money......don't you mean Sallie Mae."
God told us this fall that He would provide for us. He is going to meet our needs. He has made a promise and we stand firm that it will happen. God is going to provide for us financially, so I can serve others.
Why Us?
No idea. Many have asked. We have asked. We don't know why. God knows our heart and He knows mine. Is my heart better than yours? NO. Would I be a better servant? NO. My answer is I don't know why. I just know that my heart is heavy, He has made a promise, and we chose to live in His will.
What Now?
Not sure. I am done working in the middle of June and I did not borrow chocolate, I borrowed money. Money that I am responsible for, money that I owe.
We have given our situation, fears, anxieties to God. Does that make starting this journey cake? No, but it does make things a little easier. In the meantime we stand firm, continue to work, and try our best to be good stewards of what God has blessed us with.
I don't know what the month of July will look like. Am I worried about my loans? No. It is weird, and I cannot explain it, but I am not. We have such a sense of peace.....
Closing....finally!
Again, this blog was created to invite friends and family to join us as God works a miracle in our lives. We invite you to ask questions, email, and more importantly....pray for us!!!
All Things Are Possible!
-Stephanie Miller
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. I have wanted to get in touch with many people to share with them what is happening. I promise that my posts will not be this long......I just had a lot to say!! :)
Here is a little background information for those of you who don't know us well.......
Brad and I met, dated, and were married while I finished my senior year in college. The path that led us to Bethel was very different. Brad knew that he wanted to go to college. He worked hard in high school, graduated with good grades and received scholarships for Bethel. Me on the other hand, different story. I decided my senior year that I wanted to go to Bethel. Why Bethel? Because my friends were going there. At the time I was barely going to graduate high school, but I knew that I wanted to go to Bethel College. As time progressed, I knew that God was sending me to Bethel. I did not have the grades to be accepted, but after a couple of classes at a community college, I was accepted to Bethel.
It did not take long for me to realize how important high school really was. I had spent so much time playing around, walking the halls, and hanging out in random gym classes, that I had no idea how to study. I remember typing papers early in my freshmen year of college, sending them to print, and turning them in without even reading them. I received a syllabus for each class, but did not read the material because the teacher never said we had to in class. When I entered Bethel I had no idea what was in store for me.......let alone studying for 4 years?!?!
The rest of my college career was spent reading, studying, praying, proofing, spell checking, reading, praying, writing, researching, praying, studying, and sleeping little. In the spring of 2005 I graduated with a Bachelors and Associates degree. Oh....and did I mention that I spent a semester on the Dean's List? :)
Brad and I were married in 2004 and after I graduated we moved to Flint....yeah, back to Flint.
After a long job hunt, we ended up in careers that we studied for and love. Brad works in the IT department at an insurance company and I am an assistant director and teacher at a preschool. We both worked very hard and thanked God for blessing us with such wonderful careers.
The more I enjoyed my job, the more I worked. I had a christian boss and and a great work family. My goal in life was to work, earn as much money as possible, and buy as many things possible. I wanted a big fat house, brand new cars, lots of vacations, and the opportunity to eat out whenever I pleased. I did not think much about those in need because after all they were choosing not to work as hard as I was. If they wanted nice things, they should work hard.
Calm Down....I'm not finished......
We decided in the winter of 2008 that it was time for kids. I was still going to work...because I needed all of those things, remember? In January of 2009 we had Grant. I will talk about him more in another post......
Since having Grant God has changed my heart. I don't think that it was just having Grant that changed me, God did a complete overhaul on my heart. He has taught me that there is more to life than stuff, money, and pride. I knew that I could not take my treasures to Heaven with me, but why not enjoy life as long as I was on this earth?
WRONG........
What exactly is happening on this earth? People who are hurting, suffering, dying because their needs are not being met. There are children going to school without having dinner the night before.....children uneducated.....children left alone.....children suffering. There are parents trying to make ends meet....doing what they can to survive. Are they not working hard enough? I believe that many are working harder that I ever have. God has given me a heavy, heavy heart for those in need.
In the summer of 2009, I felt God telling me that my time at the preschool was coming to an end. Of course, I did not accept His suggestion. By the fall, I realized that it was not a suggestion and my time at the school was coming to an end....whether I was ready or not. After a lot of prayer, I knew that God was telling me to give my notice at work. Hello? Who gives a notice in November that they are done in June? Me....... I argued with Him at first, but He was not changing His mind.
In June I will end my journey at the preschool and begin another journey. A journey that is a little scary. I enjoy my job and cannot picture me not working.....it seems crazy. What will I do in my spare time? See, while God was overhauling my heart, He was asking me to commit my spare time to those in need. I wondered....can't I serve those in need while I work. His answer...no.
There is always a BUT.......
What is the problem then? Serving God sounds good right? Yes, BUT....remember those scholarships for Bethel that Brad received that I did not? Yeah, my non-scholarships ended up to be big fat student loans. We cannot afford for me to quit working.
He always has a plan.
While at Bethel, Brad and I discussed my student loan debt, along with his debt. His was pocket change compared to mine. We were never worried and were well aware that we had a lot to repay. We both wanted to work...especially myself. Remember, I needed all that stuff.
Another reason why I was not worried was because God told me while in school that He would pay off my student loans. I did not think about it often and told Brad that my loans were taken care of. We actually joked about it....because it seemed crazy.
God is not crazy.
He had all of this planned. Sending me to Bethel, meeting Brad, graduating, allowing me to be consumed by the world, and ending with a complete heart overhaul. Oh...and did I mention the Dean's List? :)
What else did He have planned? The student loans. When I came home my senior year from high school and made my college announcement my mom asked me how I was going to pay for it and I said "my friends just called Fannie May and they got money." To that she replied "Stephanie, that is chocolate, you need money......don't you mean Sallie Mae."
God told us this fall that He would provide for us. He is going to meet our needs. He has made a promise and we stand firm that it will happen. God is going to provide for us financially, so I can serve others.
Why Us?
No idea. Many have asked. We have asked. We don't know why. God knows our heart and He knows mine. Is my heart better than yours? NO. Would I be a better servant? NO. My answer is I don't know why. I just know that my heart is heavy, He has made a promise, and we chose to live in His will.
What Now?
Not sure. I am done working in the middle of June and I did not borrow chocolate, I borrowed money. Money that I am responsible for, money that I owe.
We have given our situation, fears, anxieties to God. Does that make starting this journey cake? No, but it does make things a little easier. In the meantime we stand firm, continue to work, and try our best to be good stewards of what God has blessed us with.
I don't know what the month of July will look like. Am I worried about my loans? No. It is weird, and I cannot explain it, but I am not. We have such a sense of peace.....
Closing....finally!
Again, this blog was created to invite friends and family to join us as God works a miracle in our lives. We invite you to ask questions, email, and more importantly....pray for us!!!
All Things Are Possible!
-Stephanie Miller
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. I have wanted to get in touch with many people to share with them what is happening. I promise that my posts will not be this long......I just had a lot to say!! :)
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